Acrostics

In my last advanced poetry writing class we discussed the poem "This Be The Verse", by Philip Larkin. It starts off very interestingly with the line, "They fuck you up, your mum and dad." This of course is pretty offensive to some people, really a lot of people simply won't like the fact that he used the word fuck so liberally. And really what isn't offensive about the word fuck... regionally of course some people find it less offensive, Lewis Black claims that in New York fuck is simply a comma.
Anyways, the class got together to come up with some challange poems and one of them was a non-offensive fuck poem. Or rather a non-offensive poem that uses the word fuck. I've decided to accept the challange, as well as cheat, and perhaps even make the poem about cheating (since really that seems like a good idea as any at this juncture)(it didn't turn out to be about cheating, but I cheated none the less).
So here is my relatively non-offensive fuck poem.


To the administration

Friday I have a test.
unless I can find a way out of this
catastrophe, I will be
kicked out of school.

You see I need to keep up my grades
or my parents will stop paying
until I bring them back up,

but I have no money.
If I don't get any money
there will
certainly be no money for you.
Here is my last check. I just wanted to
end on a good note.
Sincerely yours.

Copyright 2007 William Curb